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Story by Zerin Dube & Michael Mills
Photography by Zerin Dube

Price: $60,380 (est)
Major equipment: : 6.2L V8 engine, AMG SPEEDSHIFT PLUS 7-speed automatic transmission, AMG seating package: premium leather, memory seats, 4-way power steering column ($2,980 option), Premium Package 2: rear sunshade, bi-xenon headlamps ($1,100 option)

In the fleet: August 2008

Z. DUBE: Anyone who has known me long enough knows that I lust after family sedans that have been pumped up with a healthy dosage of horsepower. My love affair for sedans on steroids started with my former “B5″-generation Audi S4; it started life with the factory-provided 250 horsepower, but through some careful part sourcing and a bit of fiscal irresponsibility, my relatively calm family sedan turned into a 400+ horsepower monster. There’s nothing more satisfying than stomping a Corvette or Mustang Cobra in a four-door luxury sedan. Unfortunately, all this power came at the cost of a voided factory warranty. Pumping up a B5 S4 to those horsepower levels required that the engine be pulled out of the car, painstakingly tweaked, and then stuffed back in so it could generate enough heat to roast a pig. Back then though, this was the route you had to take if you wanted that level of performance in a sedan.

More on the C63, and on-track timing/impressions from Grand-Am/NASA GTS driver Michael Mills, after the jump.

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Photography by Murilee Martin

What did the 24 Hours of Lemons (Thunderhill) and the “C Sports Racer” class of the SCCA 2008 Runoffs have in common? They were both won by motorcycle-engined lightweight specials that didn’t quite belong…

This is an outrageously long podcast — nearly 18 minutes — and it covers two primary topics. The first topic is the “spirit of Lemons” and what happens when it takes a bike-engined special to win a “budget” race. The second is a rambling diatribe on the notion of “driving at the limit” complete with some racetrack times from a recent press event.

This is, with any luck, the last podcast we’ll do with this lousy microphone — so if you can live with one more episode full of “pops”, things should be better next time.

 

 SSL Radio 12/29/2008 [0:13m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Merry Christmas from all of us at Speed:Sport:Life! Even if you didn’t get that LS460 wrapped in a bow, we hope you got all the other automotive goodies you asked for.

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Story by Jack Baruth

Hey there, Mr. Average Car Enthusiast! Do you like watching Top Gear? Of course you do. I mean, what’s not to like? They have cool, super-sarcastic reviews of new cars, some on-track hooligan behavior, and wacky “comparisons” between Bugattis and scooters. Everybody loves TG. Well, I have some good news for you. There’s a magazine out there, and it’s, like a hundred times cooler than Jeremy Clarkson, Captain Slow, and The Guy Who Crashed the Jet Car could ever be. Their reviews are better, because most of the reviewers have a background in automotive engineering, wheel-to-wheel competition, or both. The writing’s funny yet informative. Instead of screwing around on an empty track somewhere, doing trivially easy stunts and “racing” against their own times, these guys build real racecars for real race sanctions, not to mention a series of outrageous engine-swapped project cars. They test tires under controlled conditions and report the results honestly. They’ve developed completely new methodologies for performance testing, making their results the most consistent and reliable in the history of automotive journalism. There’s even a considerable amount of authentic, documented civil-disobedience-mixed-with-raw-stupidity in each issue. Best of all – and this is what separates them from Grassroots Motorsports, the reading of which affects any genuinely literate man in much the same manner that the sound of nails scratching a chalkboard does an elementary-school teacher – they’ve recruited nearly every great writer in the industry to contribute monthly columns ranging from the aggressively erudite to the simply heartbreaking. Trust me, this is all good stuff.

The best part of all? It’s totally free. Are you ready to start reading? Sure you are. Here’ s how to get started: Go to your local library and ask for the microfiche department. Once you find said department, file a request for “Car and Driver, any year from 1970 to 1990.” Load the film into the microfiche machine… and if you’ve never read anything from the Golden Age Of Car And Driver, prepare to be amazed. Those of us who are over thirty-five know that Ozzy Osbourne wasn’t always a shambling, disconnected shell of a man picking up dog crap and mumbling incoherently through a series of humiliating interludes; the guy used to be the effing Prince Of Darkness, screaming his lyrics with violent passion, biting the heads off bats, rendering parent-teacher associations speechless with terror. By that same token, it’s hard for my younger readers to understand that C/D wasn’t always a complete joke of a publication, that it wasn’t always a mishmash of tossed-off sarcasm and WeatherTech advertisements, thinly disguised press releases and threadbare prose, incomprehensible comparo-test results and Ten Best lists sorted in order of perceived dashboard quality. It’s been years since I met a young person who took the magazine or its content seriously. Today, the kids are all watching Top Gear or reading EVO, slavishly imitating Clarkson’s sarcastic style or quoting Dickie Meaden’s fast-road observations verbatim, not understanding that the English stuff is mostly entertainment, not journalism.

Enough is enough. The announcement that Csaba Csere is walking away from the Editor-in-Chief position has brought C/D temporarily back into the Internet’s itinerant spotlight, and before the magazine disappears for good from the enthusiasts’ collective consciousness, I feel compelled to explain why it was once great, how it lost that greatness, and why its days are all but over.

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Photography by Zerin Dube

Price: $33,030
Major equipment: : 1.3L RENESIS 6-port rotary engine, 6-speed manual transmission, Bilstein shock absorbers, HID headlamps 19-inch forged alloy wheels w/ 225/40R19 tires, R3 specific aero kit, Recaro seats, Sirius satellite radio ($430 option)

In the fleet: 12/11/2008 - 12/18/2008

Approximate mileage driven: 170

Z. DUBE: When the original Mazda RX-8 was launched in 2003, rotary fans across the world rejoiced. Mazda’s famous rotary engine design had found a new home, by way of a very unique four-door sports car. Since 2003, Mazda has changed very little on the RX-8 with the exception of a few special edition models to keep interest fresh. This lack of change comes with good reason, as Mazda has managed to form a very tight knit community of RX-8 loyalists that simply love their cars.

For the 2009 model year, Mazda has refreshed the design of RX-8 to bring it more in line with the current corporate design language. A new front fascia and subtle body treatment changes like new mirrors and LED taillamps add some much needed aggressiveness to the design. The RX-8’s passenger cabin received a subtle update as well, starting with an all-new steering wheel that resembles those found on MX-5 and CX-7. Front and rear seats have been updated across all trim levels, and the dashboard layout has been restyled to achieve a better flow between the gauge cluster and the center stack. Under the skin, Mazda has fitted the RX-8 with a trapezoidal strut-tower bar and a revised front suspension tower to help improved body stiffness. The rear suspension has been updated to provide better handling while enhancing the ride quality.

More on the new R3, plus a competitive prediction from an SCCA National Solo driver, after the jump…

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Price: $54,950
Major equipment: 6.2L LS3 V8, 6-speed manual transmission, dual-mode performance exhaust, 5-spoke forged chrome aluminum wheels, transparent removable roof panel

In the fleet: 12/04/2008 - 12/11/2008

Approximate mileage driven: 285

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Junkyard photography by Dave Everest

Remember New Coke? Sure you do. Some people liked it more, some people liked it less, and eventually the Coke people gave up and just put the old stuff back on the grocery-store shelves. So here we are with the “New Coke” of podcasts.

Our veteran podcaster Kasey Kagawa has taken a hiatus from bringing you the latest podcasted auto-industry news, so instead you get me as your podcaster du jour. The format’s a little different; it’s less “informative” and more “unhinged ranting”. Feel free to let us know how you feel about the change!

 

 SSL Radio 12/15/2008 [0:14m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

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Photography by Dave Everest

SMACK! My right fist banged off the arm of my pumpkin-colored Natuzzi recliner as the swelling bloodthirsty tide of righteous f***ing indignation crested in my feverishly twisting heart. In the space of a moment I’d redone all the tendon and ligament damage so patiently healed over the course of the past month, an injury suffered in a last-ditch but ultimately successful attempt to keep my completely sideways Neon race car off the man-killing concrete wall in Putnam Park’s final turn by dialing in steering corrections faster than my hands could accomplish without literally ripping the sinew from the bone. The pure adrenaline which had then twisted the wheel into a blur of spokes now bulged my eyes from their sockets. I was going to find this guy and beat him until he couldn’t stand. I would pull him up by his neck, flick out my titanium-gold-nitrided Kershaw assisted-opening knife, and cut his eyeballs out, one at a time, taking care to pop each optic nerve off with a delicate finishing flourish. And then I’d really get angry. Death would be too good for this guy.

It was a single typed sentence that gave spur to my murderous rage. A single sentence that neatly encapsulates the sullen stupidity at the heart of so many so-called “automotive enthusiasts”. A single sentence that any thinking man would be ashamed to utter. It was, paraphrased a bit to protect the guilty:

lol american cars suck the last one im glad the last one i ever drove was a 1980 buick skylark that totally sucked

Putting aside the bloody infernal cheek of insulting the premium X-body compact, the friendly-looking, velour-lined small Buick known in contemporary advertising as “The little limousine”, can you see why I was angry enough to contemplate booking a last-minute flight to California (of course that kind of idiocy finds its expression in California) for the sole purpose of committing a bit of the old ultra-violence? This drooling moron wants the “Big Three” to sink into the abyss of history… because he didn’t like the 1980 Skylark? He’s deriving his perspective on perhaps the most dangerous moment in the entire history of the American middle class from a drive in a twenty-eight-year-old car? It’s too ridiculous to seriously contemplate – except for the fact that, judging by what I’ve seen and read of the Detroit “bailout” hearings, the elected officials of our government aren’t much smarter than Mr. Skylark.

It’s time to cut the crap, and that’s why this will be the shortest Avoidable Contact you’ll ever read. The “bailout” must happen. Without it, we’re all going to suffer serious consequences, and by “we” I mean you, me, the guy down the street, Mr. Skylark, and everybody who has ever spent more than five minutes of their life away from “World of Warcraft”. I don’t care if you love American cars or despise them; without the bailout, you’re in trouble, pal. You can take my word for it, or you can keep reading to find out why even the most testosterone-challenged, America-hating, hemp-wearing, Prius-pedaling tree-hugger needs Detroit to keep cranking out the American Iron.

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Welcome to the first installment of “Speed Read”. In this feature, various S:S:L editors will be offering quick opinions on the vehicles which come through our press fleet. As always, we’re interested in your opinions… do you want these features to be longer? Shorter? More car-jumping? Let us know!

Price: $33,560
Major equipment: 230-horsepower 3.0 Duratec V6, six-speed automatic, Sync 2.0 with navigation, “VOGA” trim package

In the fleet: 11/19/2008 - 11/26/2008

Approximate mileage: 560

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Yesterday’s Senate Banking hearings were less chiding and venomous than expected — but I still arrived at the finish line suitably toasted. Today, as Detroit presents their case to the House of Representatives Financial Services Committee at an even earlier hour, the goal is to stay out of my roommates’ liquor stash.

The rules have changed slightly:

- One sip of wine for each incorrect quality jab lobbed at the manufacturers.
- Two sips of wine for each unfair fuel economy jab lobbed at the manufacturers.
- Finish the glass if Congress mentions travel to the hearings via Hybrid rather than Jet. (Thanks Doug!)
- Two glasses if the phrase “We’re here because of GM” is uttered… or a forced GM-Chrysler merger is presented as a logical idea.
- One shot every time a Congressman hailing from a state that’s given billions in incentives to foreign manufacturers broadly opposes the loan.
- Shotgun a stolen Shiner Bock if: Daimler is blamed for Chrysler’s woes; Chrysler’s choice of hybrid is criticized; any CEO blames the UAW outright for its role in this crisis.

08:31 CDT: Here we go.

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